When I got deployed to Afghanistan in 2012, I knew that I wouldn't come home the same. I knew that I would probably see some things, maybe even do some things, that I would have to carry with me for the rest of my life. I also knew that there was a much higher than normal possibility that I wouldn't be coming home at all; if you asked me about it at this time last year, I would have told you that I wished I hadn't made it back. Up until early 2019, I had tried dozens of different treatments for my PTSD and Depression symptoms. I tried different medications and combinations of meds, different treatments using magnets and flashing lights in my eyes to stimulate my brain and facilitate healing, different therapy styles, in-patient programs, and electroconvulsive therapy. Most of these were ineffective for me, and some had side-effects that outweighed any benefit. By 2018, my health had deteriorated to the point where I was actively making plans to end my life and had already checked myself into the psychiatric ward at Tripler more than once. In March 2019, I checked myself into the emergency room at Tripler for the third time that year and knew that I had exhausted all the resources that the VA was willing to offer me. The treatment team at the Tripler in-patient psychiatric ward were able to connect me with Dr. Cook. After a thorough examination and discussion, we decided to move forward with using Ketamine to treat my Depression symptoms. My experience with past treatments had already set my expectations pretty low, but I was willing to try anything that wasn't demonstrably unsafe. My standard for success was that just by trying a new treatment option I might feel less helpless and find some hope for a future, and that those closest to me might see some improvement and let me know that good things were happening. After the first treatment, I immediately noticed that my suicidal thoughts were gone and I no longer felt like the universe was trying to crush me out of existence. Initially I thought that this might be temporary, as Dr. Cook explained to me that the medication would still be in my body even after the psychedelic effects wore off. Days went by while I tracked my thoughts and mood for signs of a relapse; nothing. Then after about a month, something amazing happened; I noticed that I had just stopped thinking about suicide all together. I moved on. In the last 10 months, I have made more progress on my treatment than in the previous 6 years since I returned home. Dr. Cook and his staff have played a pivotal role in my recovery, and even though parts of this review were extremely difficult for me to write down, let alone share with potentially 7 billion strangers, those difficulties seem small when measured against all I've gained with their help. Mahalo.